Why You Should Never Name Your Dog, Your Dog

Heed my words and avoid this nightmare. Comsider yourself warned.

First imagine what it's like not even having a dog named Your Dog.
A) Can you call your dog?
B) Sure, "Come here Pup!"
A) No, I meant can you call "Your Dog!"
B) Oh sorry.. "Your Dog!!"
A) Thanks man. That was perfect.

If that isn't bad enough, now imagine what it would be like if your dog's name was "Your Dog"?
A) Can you call, Your Dog?
B) Why are you asking him if he can call? He's a dog, he can't use the phone.
A) No I meant can you 'call' your dog?
B) He can bark, but that's about it.
A) Ok let me clarify, Can you call your dog your dog?
B) I call all my dogs my dogs.
A) Sorry, I meant can you call Your Dog your dog?
B) Of course I can call Your Dog my dog.. .hes my dog after all.
A) No, i meant can you call your Dog Your Dog?
B) Well I would only do that if it was Your Dog.
A) Wait, are you talking about my dog?
B) No, I was talking about Your Dog.
A) Oh ok, that makes sense. So I was asking if you can you call your dog Your Dog?
B) What is you problem? Of course I can call him Your Dog. That's what I named him.
A) No, I meant can you call Your Dog, Your Dog.
B) Well, if I call his name out really loud twice like that he'll get over excited.
A) What I meant is  can you call your dog, Your Dog.
B) Oh you mean Your Dog and not my other dog Bowser?
A) Yes, that one.
B) No problem! Come here Your Dog!

http://www.decontrabas.com/

Another Thing That Sucks About Christianity

So with this Thanksgiving nearly upon us, I've been soendibg some time sitting back and reflecting on all the real bad things about christianity and why christians are all fucking douchebags (I mean, c'mon.. right?).  Upon pondering, I've added another to the list that I think you'll all agree with me on.

What the fucks up with all the giving? 

I mean c'mon... from free food baskets to Christmas toys for poor kids... who the fuck do these people think they are?

http://www.nj.com/news/index.ssf/2007/11/good_people_reach_out_to_the_n.html

http://www.dailycamera.com/news/boulder/ci_24551565/churches-boulder-broomfield-longmont-accepting-donations-operation-christmas

Google to the Rescue - Gmail Tips + ?

So, once again Google has totally blown my mind (but not my balls - yet...)

This may not seem like a big deal to anyone else, but I just discovered that, not only does Google support multiple shortcuts (duh), but that GMail actually has a "cheat-sheet" for easy display.

Why is this important? Well... it's probably not. UNLESS your hands hurt so bad that you can't use a fucking mouse any longer. As well, this is my life. Anyway, does Google have to have a reason to be awesome? I think not. Read this and try not to consider how little it actually has to do with this post.

Harrison Ford Trying Not to Consider It

Ive been spending time Googling different pages looking for various shortcut commands. I've just found the holy grail (think Harrison Ford) of Gmail shortcuts - oh yeah... and go fuck yourself if you think it's lame (unless you're a lady, then go spank yourself ... (and then video yourslef doing it again please) ).

<SHIFT> + <?> 

This is it...No really. This is the blowjob I was talking about.

Seriously though, Shift and ? bring this popup right in the middle of what you're doing. I wont bore you (further) with any details (ie. that pressing 'g' and then 'i', jumps you directly to your inbox, or that 'c' brings up a compose window and '<ctrl> + <Enter> send a message, or .... *snore* ). Regardless, just fucking click Shift and ?, and read the shit for yourself.

Anyway, this blew my mind.

.. as did this
(psychojunc.deviantart.com )

Oh, one last thing for you Chrome users (Ctrl + Shift + N) brings up an incognito window. As well <Ctrl> + <F4> shut down a tab quickly without shutting off the whole browser. But we already knew all that .... ;) Seriously though, <Ctrl> + <PageDown> is my fav navigation tool.

Ciao

When a Rectal Prolapse Became Enticing

So I find it hilarious that my article "When a Rectal Prolapse Becomes Sexy" is my most visited post. In case you missed it, I posted it here, and it's pointing out how fucked up I think it is that the internet is plugged up (gross pun! lol) with videos of people having a rectal prolapse, and that we dudes are beating off to it. We really are fucking animals (Nggghhh... yeah! *pant pant*).

Anyway, I'm pretty sure that all the hits that have come are from people that thought it was going to be a picture or a video. Nobody left a comment.  I wouldnt! haha!

Anyway...
That's all I got tonight.

Doing Her Like A Real Man

Follow me. I've got a story to tell you.

I watched this porn video the other day where this chick was totally into it... totally getting laid into, and right at this point where she's really enjoying it (you can see on her face, she's really having a good time), the dude sticks his finger in her mouth from behind (this was all happening from behind) and pulls on her face like a fish hook. Totally surprised her, but she went right with it, and the scene rolled on.

I was like.. what the fuck was that? Was she just enjoying it a little too much for porn or something? I guess the guy felt like he needed to demean her a little (see if you can bounce your dick off her face) so the dudes watching would be able to masturbate properly. Cause you know, if you're watching porn, you can't really get off unless you put that dirtly little bitch in her place, right? Nghh.. ungh.. yeah!

Thank you for making me eat your sperm

What is it with us guys? We get off to totally treating woman like shit. It's sexy to us. Get's the blood flowing to our dicks. Somehow, the more helpless the dirty little whore is, the more we get off. Speaking of which, if a woman treated a dude the way that the dudes treat chicks in any porn, it would be considered a dominance video. However, when its the dude doing it, its just normal. Why do chicks put up with this kind of shit? It's like you don't realize that this all this isn't being done for you. It's being done to you.
Read this article if you can't figure out what I'm talking about..

I got an idea. How about a porn video... (yeah? yeah?!) where the guy.... (oh yeah! keep going!) .. screwed the girl to orgasm.. (unnhhhh,.... unhhh....) and instead of calling her a dirty whore, sperming on her face, or fish-hooking her lips.. (um. wait..) just fucked the shit out of her? And let her fuck the shit out of him? And all just because they really like sex, and may even just like to try weird shit out. (limp..).

The bizkit ain't the only thing limp here

That porn video doesn't work. It doesn't work because dudes have become addicted to getting off to dominant sex. The more we think about doing it to the girl... the more it turns us on. If you have a video where the girl is enjoying it too much and is an equal partner in the sex act, it shatters the illusion. It takes away what's really turning guys on.

Dude, I'm not against porn. I like porn. I just have a hard fucking time (pun not intended, but appreciated) watching it. Because honestly, it difficult to beat off to someone being treated poorly.

Dudes, we can either continue to act like dogs, because we think thats the only way we can really enjoy sex, or we can start acting like humans. human dudes having sex with human girls. Two fucking monkeys getting together and smashing genitals together. You're gonna find it out its better. But yeah, you're gonna probably going to have to give up on the whole tearing her panties up her ass while doing her face squished down on your car, thing. Here's what you need to do. Pull her up. Take off her panties properly, see if she needs a cushion for her forehead... and then do her face down on the top of your car... like a real man.

Im Just Gonna Call "Truth" On This One

It Is What It Is and It Really Fucking Sucks

Person 1: "I cant stop fighting with my wife. She  called me an 'asshole motherfucker', and peeled out. The kids are pretty traumatized and they hardly sleep at night anymore since she left".

Person 2: "Wow dude.. that sucks." *look of concern*

Person 1: "Yeah, well... it is what it is". *cracks a beer and leans back to watch TV*

Since when did simply accepting shitty shit* just become par for course? I'm serious, its like the prevailing philosophy is to just accept something at it's shitty face value and assume that there's nothing you can do to change it. What a (to borrow a phrase from like 1 setence ago) shitty worldview.

*I can talk like this way
because Im from the
Shitty MacShittensten Clan

Now, being the crappy dude that I am ("ay.. ye's a reel shetheel") I understand that shit does happens and often there really IS nothing you can do about it. But just to settle for it because "it is what it is?" Really?

I kind of feel more along the lines of "it is what it is, and it really fucking sucks". This line of thinking seems more helpful in motivating me towards finding a way to make it something other than simply what it is.

 The truth of the matter is that, if we all just go around accepting the shit around us, nothing ever changes. Society, relationships, or that nasty ass fungus growing beneath your balls (you are so fucking gross sometimes). Honestly (in comparison to all the dishonesty of the previous paragraphs) this isn't much better than YOLO. And OMG//. you had to go there. FML

Something else that sucks shit

Treating Women Like Shit By Proxy

This is verbatim from www.pick-up-artist-forum.com  ( i just linked there from casual googling... as if i was that cool to actually be part of something like that) and was posted by a user named Incubus69 (Not to be confused with Incubus 1 - 68).

Anyway, this is a pretty fucking awesome post - the yellow highlights are mine and the content that interested me. Keep in mind this a pick-up artist who is into picking up chicks and doing the humpty hump - not some stuffy prude. Maybe you better read my porn-qualifier here.

I love watching porn as well all men do! However, PORN affects our game in our ATTITUDE. The reason why I say this is because we must have a GOOD ATTITUDE towards our women (*blog intrude* Good lord ... what is he suggesting?) and not let rubbish spoil our great unique minds! 

When you watch porn right? It automatically sends a clear message that this shit is okay. However, it's not! WOMEN aren't OBJECTS and do not like to be used like dirt. Yes, women some times do One-Night Stands; only be cause it's their way of venturing out sexual experiences, then later bragging it about to her friends. 

When we recieve this message being communicated on a subconscious level; we soon believe that it's okay to treat women like shit! In PUA it's an important rule to treat women with respect like human beings and also to be honest with them. I don't know about some of the player's out there-but they're doing a good OPEN GAME, but not sealing the deal. Maybe getting to END-GAME but at the end the women run into BUYER'S REMORSE!  

Watching PORN affects attitude, while MASTERBATING does give us relief in the moment; however it fucks our GAME up royally. The reason why I say this is because I've noticed when I don't masterbate; my game is good (I am able to approach more sufficently). ALso it takes a toll on our FRAME as well. When done masterbating we thinking women are just our slaves; not true! Women are people just like you and me! Tell me if it's true a woman wants to be throat-fucked, gagging on a huge cock 'til theirs tears coming out of her eyes?! I don't think many women would. Hell, ask Zip-better yet I will! I guarantee that women do not like to be abused. Yes, there are some women that are into kinky shit like burning waxes, whips and chains. But when it comes to abuse and sexually harming another person-it's not okay! 

Why do you think there are so many rapists running around the world? I can tell you why! First, they watch ANGRY SEX and confuse it with PLEASURE. So, when they aren't getting any and are SEXUALLY FRUSTRATED-this is when the animal instinct comes out and CAVEMAN's a woman. They don't LISTEN if a woman says no or not. They just want some pussy and they get off struggling with a woman to get in her pants.

This is why PORN+MASTERBATION=NO GAME makes us not perform. After watching PORN and studying Pick Up. You'll soon realize the difference between pleasing the woman in the right manner vs. just assaulting her sexually because you think she wants your wang to bounce on her face, or squirt in her face (possibly blinding her in the long term. LOL! That was a joke guys!). 
If you really understand what I'm saying and accept what I'm saying then you'll soon see the difference in your APPROACH and ATTITUDE towards women. The RIGHT ATTITUDE is the correct method of PU.

I'm only basing this on experience and knowledge. If you guys say something otherwise and not agree then it's okay. We all have different viewpoints and opinions. We are family here! We must treat each other like brother and sisters. 
Do you think what I'm saying is true guys? If so respond! 
Peace out!

...

Images from: thesocietypages.org

What If I Told You...

Inflammatory, shallow meme

Good question. What if Morpheus told you that you are part of the problem? How embarassing would that be? I mean... this is fucking MORPHEUS here. Talk about FML. Hmm.. anyway, I imagine the conversation would go something like this:

"Good god no! How can it be wrong for me to be so displeased about the poor way that people are treating other people, that I treat them poorly? How can it be, that in confronting the lack of love in some individuals, that it would be wrong for me to be as unloving to them as they have been to others? How could it be wrong to post inflammatory shallow memes to show how ignorant the other side is to post inflammatory shallow memes?"

Woahh... calm the fuck down (and stay the hell away from my memes - check warning here). Take a chill pill and let's talk this through.

You, taking a chill-pill

 Better yet.. let's not.


image from: www.pxleyes.com 

When Dumb People Hate On Dumb People

If you're going to ridicule religion than great.. have at it (ahhh... nom! nom! nom!). But if you are, than dont wear crystals, talk about the mother-spirit, reincarnation, magnets, aliens, or any of this other shit. Because than you're advocating the same thing you're mocking (ignorance and superstion in case you were wondering). And that makes you a hypocrite. And not to mention, makes you look as stupid as you think that everyone else is (oops.. i mentioned it.)

 *... 

So my advice? If you're gonna hate on it, than be honest and hate on it all.

5C1EnCE d0e5 N07 EKw4l K0Rp0R4710n

The problem is not with scientific knowledge, but with the immoral use of that knowledge by businesses and large corporations.

Let's take the pharmaceutical companies for instance...  everyone seems to know that Americans are over-medicated. Anti-depressants seem to be everywhere, and a lot of people recognize that people just need to get their shit together. .. . so what does this do? It embitters people towards the fact that scientific knowledge/medications/reasearch can be used for the common good of all humanity, and causes them to instead conclude that science is a bunch of shit (much like the piece of shit imaged below)... which leaves everyone disenfrachised from actual working knowledge.

Someone dropped their anti-depressants

For instance, (as mentioned above) because of the abuse of the Pharm companies, the thought arises that Psychologists don't really know what they're talking about (because people think of pharm companies and psychiatrists together). That somehow the science must be debunk. The science isn't debunk, but the immoral profit making motive of handing out pills like candy is. 

Science <> Corporations .. or in lay-mans terms, science is not the same thing as corporations,,, or in to make it more clear in l337, 5C1EnCE d0e5 N07 EKw4l K0Rp0R4710n.

If you think this was a lame ass post. you are probably right... let me add this psychic albino sasquatch to make up for your lost moments.

This is just a fucking awesome picture
(Sanchez. "Pseudoscience". http://phil-sanchez.deviantart.com/art/Pseudoscience-314367683)

All You Lying Bitches

Words are funny.. they dont always necessarily mean what you think they mean.

For example,

• "ive been waiting a million years"
• "I feel like shit"
• I didn't hit your mom (I merely bitch-slapped her)

My hypothesis is that most people use words allegorically to express deeper meaning and emotion without regard to validity of expression (wuh?...) . This is why I can say to you "it feels like you stepped on my balls with cleates and then dug in while singing the national anthem in spanish", when it doesn't really feel like you are stepping on my balls with cleats and digging in while singing the national anthem. Rather, it merely felt like you were abusing me with no regards for my feelings .

dont try this

HOWEVER, that's not the point of this post. The point has to do more with the concept of lying and truth. I am a firm believer that most people don't outright consciously lie (although you mother-fuckers are out there), but rather use words to describe their reality (or justification) for their actions, their worldview, the reasons they do things. Their words may techincally be lies, BUT (big butt) they probably make sense in the context of the speakers rationale - no matter how fucked up that rationale may be.

Which kind of comes to my point... classical understanding of "telling the truth" and "lying" may not make as much sense today as does... say.. seeking to understand, engaging in another person's worldview, and finding the most loving way to respond. *Gasp* Good lord no... Has it really come to this?

*Photo from photobucket.com  / images.google.com

How Internet Arguments Work

*Ripped off from Rationalhub.com

When A Rectal Prolapse Becomes Sexy

So, i was just reading this article http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2013/feb/16/iceland-online-pornography. The article is worth reading as it tells the tale of a little place called Iceland (which is really the green land, but whatever...) and it's efforts to (wait for it)... ban violent porn from their society. *listens to firebombing and riots happening in the distance*

(Gather round children for the Legend of El Chupa Nibre)

Now, before you get your panties in a bundle (believe me i understand... these pornstaresses (wtf was that?) are totally empowered and not objectified *cough* *cough* .. I'm not going off on a tirade about porn (read my "Dont get me wrong motherfucker" qualifier here).. just wanted to mention something that got my imagination. 

..

wait for it.... this is gonna be hot..

..

Anal Prolapse 

wow.. there it is,  I almost came in my pants just then. So hot. nghh... uhhh... but yes, what does it have to do with this blog? Well, it turns out that, at least according to the prime minister of Iceland, that "anal relapse" is a problem plaguing pornstars in America, and (on a sidenote) an example of the type of abusive poronorgraphic material they are trying to kick out of their society.

(by the way, there's a disgusting picture below. consider yourself warned)

Here's the actual quote:

"If a 12-year-old searches for porn in Google, he doesn't get somePlayboy pictures, he gets graphic brutal hardcore images of women being choked with tears running down their faces and of the kind of anal sex that has female porn stars in America suffering from anal prolapses."

Wow.. where to start? Well, first of all, let me just say to any of you that are like "omg!wtf!die!" because youre thinking about the horrors of "censorship", chill the fuck out (and i mean that with love). This is actually fascinating for a number of reasons

1. Because this isn't America we're talking about. This is Iceland and they don't have the same laws and conclusions regarding freedom of speech that America does. 
2. This is a fascinating social experiment. I think we all forget that each country is not an extension of every other country, but is an experiment on its own. Icelanders have the absolute right to tweak the construct of their society. 
3. No one has done this before. We actually dont know if society would be better or not. This is social science motherfucker.
4. The prime minister of Iceland is openly gay. That's right.. openly gay. Not evangelical Christian.

But anyway, back to anal prolapses (yum yum!). I was kind of shocked to hear this even if i was by no means surprised  So anyway, I first went to Wikipedia and saw this, which really just wet my appetite for the subject:

Hint: This isnt a penis

Next I googled "rectal prolapse porn" to see if I could find any corroborating research and found that instead of medical journals I was offered up several porn sites where I could actually WATCH a rectal prolapse in progrss! Even better! In fact, one site promised me some "Lesbian anal fisting until real anal prolapse". In all, I scanned a total of 10 pages of google search pages of vidoes of rectal prolapses that I could beat off to. I was of course giddy with delight.

But actually i wasnt... i actually though that it was fucking gross and awful. Listen to the fuckedupness of this... I couldn't find information about whether or not rectal prolapses are a real problem or not in the porn industry *pause* because... the search engine was inundated by the opportunity to beat off to REAL porn videos of ladies suffering a rectal prolapse.
..
(take that in for a second)

..

I'm just gonnat take a leap here and say that this is violent and disgusting... disturbing of the "I fucked that bitch till her asshole was falling out of her ass (yeeha! ), and you know she deserved it. ('weeedaddy!')", variant. And come on.. im not talking about a good rodgering in the ass (i mean who doesnt like it in the ass every now again, right?), im talking about watching someones anal cavity weaken and fall out their ass on pornTube. Really guys?

How to Be Less Superstious and Less of a Jackass

*Camera, lights, boob strips, action*... Superstition is the scourge of humanity. Actually, let me rephrase that.. anthropormophism is the problem.. well to be more succint.. people are the fucking problem. *cough*

Why are people the problem? Because people are fucking idol making, sun-worshipping, anthropromorphising, idiots (and i mean that in the most loving way of course). Only humans have the ability to use their power of collective symbol making to create ideas that enslave and institutions to reinforce; trees that talk and spirits to tend them. It's a fucking human thing.. we've been doing this shit for years.

My big problem is that so many people seem to be feeling all snuggy and warm about their stance against such dumbness, but I wonded if they have asked themselves these simple questions.

• Have I ever talked about the earth as if its running its own systems
• "the earth wants to keep equilibrium..."
• Do I talk about evolution as if it is an intellectually driven process?
• "evolution will adapt so that... "
• "this happened because evolution knew that we needed to..."

Because that's all supersition as well.

The earth systems dont' happen because the earth "needs" them to be in equilibrium: the shit happens because the laws of the universe lend to equilibrium.  The earth happens because of the draw of gravity on matter*, and the interaction of energy with gasses and liquids and solids: not because it "HAS" to.. but because that's the way the shit works. And you could change the entire galaxy and the "earth" wouldn't give a fuck, because the shit that makes up the "earth" and its systems, will react to whatever new environment its introduced to, molecule by molecule, atom by atom. Tear the shit apart.

Evolution is the same way. A big word given to a process that happens over a fuck-load long time, because life has developed in a manner that offers change. Evolution has no driving force behind it looking for the best thing to happen. Evolution is merely a description of survival. And as we all know, what survives isn't necesarrily always the best, its just whatever survived (watch The Phantom of Menace again and tell me that Jar-Jar Binks was the best thing for Star Wars, if you want to argue this ). 

So whats the point? Just realizing that we're all the problem. A lot of people hating on religions (mmm.. love me some good religion basing), and you know what? Im kinda down with it*.  But I do think its kind of stupid to go after one source and ignore another. Sort of like going after the leaves of a tree rather than its roots.

Here's a few more questions you can ask yourself:

• Do I believe in Karma?
• Reincarnation?
• Do I read my horoscope daily?

So let me just go ahead and say it. If you're gonna be a hater, than be a sincere hater. Hate the shit in you as well. Not only can we move towards a supersition free world, but you might not be so fucking obnoxious either.

*(dont worry if you're religious.. the concept of a creator can still exist.. you just cant override physics with it anymore)

Turns Out You MIght Not Get a Demon From Doing Yoga

So seriously, i just discovered this the other day (see title if you dont know what im talking about).... but before i can expound, I need to share the context - because you got to know the context.. Let me share what my childhood was like.

My mother (gotta lover her) was a classic 80's moms who was terrified of any of this new-agey weirdness hitting the scene (wooo!). Anyrate, in mother's world, which i comfortably (sort-of) grew up in the midst of (she threw away some of my games ), was one where you were in constant fear of being deceived and posessed. Not necessarily so forcefully - but a nice slow subtle kind of a way (more like the, drinking a good tasting soup until you realize there's a dad rat in the bowl but "ITS TOO LATE BECAUSE YOU ALREADY ATE IT ALL!! BWAHAHAH!! YOUR SOUL IS MINE" sort of way ).

The demon it turns out you're not going to get

 Anyway.. yoga, tai-chi (actually tai-chi wasnt even a thing yet), D&D, all this stuff was bad. My mother went so far as to "get worried" about me because of some candles in my room (i was kind of into the candle thing for some reason, and mom thought I was worshipping something)... ... now before i go on I want to say to you to shut the fuck up.. because that's my mom your judging. Okay, thank you.. moving on.

 SO anyway, all this is context. What's the bottom line? 25 years later and I heard that my mother is thinking about taking yoga and tai-chi classes. NO big fucking deal EXCEPT that MY MOTHER IS TAKING A FUCKING YOGA CLASS. You gotta understand the gobsmackedness of this in my mind. Not that I think yoga is evil, but that my MOTHER (my mother) doesn't. What the fuck is wrong with the world? Shits not supposed to change that much in a person's life. My gawd... i havent been this fucked up in my head since I found out my dad switched to Diet Coke.. what the hell is the world coming to?... *sigh* . life changes i guess.

Well, at the end of it all, mom still "doesnt like" my D&D books in her house.. so at least there's some comfort there.

The Truth is We're All Douchebags

So i took a "douche-bag test" the other day on Facebook. Im sure it was all scientific as fuck because at the end of the test, the results just totally nailed me (right? ;) ).. anyway, the bottom line... Im a part-time douchbag (thank you very much). .Which makes sense to me.. because im actually a pretty nice guy, but i have my douchey moments...  albeit, generally its in the wake of general doucheyness all around me.. but regardless, Im a part-time douche. touche! (i only wrote that last bit because I never realized the similiarity in the two words).

Full time douchebags

Anyway, this got me thinking.. i know im not the only part-time douche out there, because I run into fuckheads all day long.. mostly well-intentioned fuck-heads. Again, most of these people probably aren't douchebags all day long, to everyone they know (allthough, there are those special ones amongst us). The truth is they are also part-time douchebags. In fact, everyone is at least a part-time douchebag.  I gave the test to my friend and turns out he has "douchebag tendencies" as well. Surprise surprise (no, i dont really think this test actually means anything.. quit being such a fucking douchebag). Does this mean that people arent worth hanging out with or investing time in? well some can definitely get stuffed, but no.. in general people are reasonably nice and simply unaware of their douchey tendencies (i honestly dont think most people realize how douchey they are). Which doesnt make it feel any better, but you know.. 

So where does that leave us? Well, maybe we just need to realize that we all have a douchbag gene. Like take you for example. Im sure you're probably a nice guy or gal (nice ass), but I'm sure you're a douchebag every once and awhile. But maybe if you realized that you are a douchebag, you might be more likely to catch yourself in the moment and totally undouchefy.Which would actually be kind of a cool thing to do. Go figure... whatever.


*picture by Cavaletto / Flicker

Medicate Yourself With Music

Now I'm not gonna claim any sort of researched validity on this at all (this is going to be anecdotal as fuck)... but i think you oughta medicate yourself throughout the day with music.
Im one of these guys who listens to music all the time during the day. And i start to find that certain music just fucks with my head... i can be listening to one song all day and totally down with it, but then listen to it later, when i have something else to do, and it gets my head space all screwed.
I've also noticed that when i'm in the car with the kids, and they're freaking out, and i'm about ready to freak out, that generally i have loud confusing rock music on .. i've literally switched over to the classic station and within a minute the intensity level of the car goes down... or maybe its me... but anyway, it works. the shit calms stuff down. .. *big breath... .. oh fuck, i need to calm my heart down*

anyhow, it got me thinking about the different way that certain music makes you feel. If you're trying to get pumped for a game or something, you dont listen to some depressing inner deep blah blah blah song, but you find something with drive to get your blood flowing and get the energy pumping. Likewise, if you're winding down for the night, you choose Floyd over Rave as it promotes your body and mind calming the fuck down. And there's a lot of other emotions that music can promote.. so why not plan your day, figure out how you want to feel during each part of it, and plan your music accordingly.

Just a Simple Warning

Something to consider...

image from memegenerator.net

Turtle Slapping Lucifer's Balls

Im just saying, it might be true*

*research has found a .2 correlation between  lucifers balls and bitch-slappin' turtles. 
Keep in mind that correlation does not infer causality.  It could be that playing with lucifer's testicles lead to bitch slappin' turtles, or the other way around.

Porn and a Chicken Suit

I just gotta ask.. what the fuck is up with porn? There's a lot of "not love" mojo going on in the scene. Dont get me wrong... DONT GET ME WRONG... (dont get me wrong motherfucker). I can dig me some good porn. but oh my god, there is some fucked up shit that goes on.

And this is where I start to think about the business... because the truth of it is, that if someone’s getting paid to have sex (woo!), they’re gonna do what their boss tells them they need to do to make a buck. People want it on your face... you got in on your face. People want it in your ass, … bam! you got it in your ass. I dont care how old you are.. i dont care what you’ve done before or havent … I dont care if youre emotional... if you want to do it you gotta let him do it to ya. oh.. and if this is gonna be your first time getting stretched that far.. even better.

Sure, maybe these young ladies dont care, but then again, maybe they dont care because they know thats what you got to do to get along in the business. All of us work shitty jobs that we got to do stuff we dont want to do.. who the fuck wants to dress up in a statue of liberty outfit and hold a sign in traffic? But we all put up with shit because we know we have to. Well, all im saying is maybe some of the young ladies are putting up with shit just becuase thats the way the business is ....

.... and thats kind of fucked up. Because, truth be known, id rather be making more money for my job and not having to wear the chicken suit... or bug the fuck out customers that clearly dont want to be bothered.. or tear the shit out of my feet on the hard concrete floor because I cant sit down as someone might see me and cause a ruckus. wtf? I imagine that the porn workers (c’mon were talking about those poor bastards(esses?) trying to get on in the business) would appreciate better pay and having to put up with less bullshit .

Truth be known, business owners suck balls (and not the good type of sucking balls). Its about profit and its about employees helping to realize that profit. The majority of us work shitty jobs which put shitty requirements on our time, headspace, and ability to be human and its all because of the demands of profit. And from what ive seen (did i mention the whole 'dont get me wrong motherfucker' thing?) , the porn scene (on whole) is scuzzy as fuck.